Friday, August 24, 2012

Flawed, but this is me.

I trip over my own two feet,
I knock things down,
I say things I don't mean,
I get angry too easily,
I don't tell you what I'm angry about,
I have days where I'd rather be alone,
Sometimes I don't even want to spend time with my friends,
I never seem to know how to pick up my phone,
Then there's that problem of forgetting to reply smses,
I'm disorganized, and misplace my things all the time,
My room's a mess and I seem to own too much stuff,
I procrastinate, and always get things done just in the nick of time,
I pig out so often, just eating and sleeping,
I talk to loudly, laugh too loudly,
Basically sometimes I'm downright ugly,
Not just physically but even emotionally,
I never show it but words cut me so deep sometimes,
Most of the time I'm nice, even when I am secretly cursing in my head,
So I guess that makes me somewhat of a hypocrite too,
I'm sarcastic, snappy and downright bitchy on off days,
Sometimes I don't wanna say sorry, even when I know I'm wrong,
I don't like losing so I end up getting defensive,
At times I tune out and pretend like I'm listening,
I tell lies just so I don't have to feel bad telling the truth,
I hide how I really feel cuz I don't want to explain myself,
I say I'm okay even when I'm not,
Not cuz I want to but just cuz it's easier,
I overthink, and I'm a natural born worrier,
I'm mostly pessimistic, and I think the worst of people and of situations,
So yes, clearly I'm not perfect, I'm far from it in fact,
I'm sorry that I don't live up to expectations,
And I'm sorry if I have disappointed you in one way or another,
Sometimes I know that I screw things up,
And I make the wrong decisions,
But trust me when I say I'm trying,
I really am,
But sometimes it's just not easy to break a habit,
And even though I'm not perfect,
I'm not ashamed of myself,
Cuz there are the better parts of me too,
But that's for another day,
For now,
Yes I'm flawed, but this is me.